[There's a cheery bit of humming over the network, the brush of fingers over the receiver.]
Test, test! Let's try... Ramuh:Ula menida tula oh (tula oh)
Tela omnida tula ei (tula ei)
...[The voice sounded strange as she sang, fuller and with its own added echo. In the recorded distance was a very brief, very quiet rumble of thunder. It silenced as the voice did, before there was a delighted applause.]
Oh, it's working! Good.
Good afternoon, one and all! I am Madhuri, a bard from the Azim Steppe, and I owe a debt. I've been tasked with creating a show, and I have just the thing... burlesque! Or cabaret. The definition of both is quite muddy, dears, but do take your pick of which term you like.
As for what that is, it's... hmm. It's song, dance, skits or even dramas with an adult flair. It's a 'put the kids to bed and come have a little loud fun' sort of thing. Viewers sit and enjoy food and drink while a solo performance or a group performance gives them a few merry little tunes while dressed in the loveliest garters, stockings and other wild things on offer!
Before you ask: It's a "look, but do not touch" sort of show. We're here to liberate and entertain, and it isn't a brothel. Tsk-
The number of times these heels of mine have been applied to faces to make the point known...
So I'm going to need the aid of some none-too-shy costume designers, daring makeup artists and even bolder performers who feel like cutting a little loose a few nights a month.[You can definitely hear the smile in her voice now:]
This ab-so-lutely includes the gentlemen as well as the ladies; I've seen some of you out and about today, fellas... let's just say I see lots of potential.
Don't be shy~
But I've held your ear for long enough. Drop me a line if you're interested either here or at my trailer in lot 26
. Unless of course you'd rather just chat with little old me instead. I'm here.
Hey so speaking of cops, anybody in the Security departments want to elaborately act out a buddy cop movie with me. I call idiot rookie cop who screws everything up in act 1.
[The voice that comes over the public channel is... odd, and new to most folks here. He pauses for a bit, as if that's the entire thought-- but, sure enough, he follows it with an obviously annoyed question.]
So we're just kind of... here, because they say so? Like... this can't be legal, can it? Has anybody tried talking to the fuckin' police about this?
[As he speaks, he gets increasingly irritated, his voice breaking.]
I'm gonna be real with you guys: I've got half a mind to just kinda magic my way out, except I'm pretty sure the Ringleader or whatever would come after me. Is that a thing?
Hello? Hello! I figured I’d introduce myself. Julien Delacroix! I'll be helping out with wardrobe and makeup.
[Well, that’s a voice made for radio. Warm and resonant and very clear, very rich. You can hear the smile in it.]
I’m something kinda like a selkie - you know, people who put on seal skins and turn into seals - but turns out we come in ‘very large bird’, too. If you find my skin anywhere, please do not attempt to steal or wear it. I will not respond by marrying you! We have to meet and maybe date and figure things out the usual way.
So this isn’t just a PSA: how about you share your name and tell the class an outrageous lie about why you’re here? Something like, oh, I really needed a new skin after those total jerks stole and burned mine. Didn’t marry ‘em either, by the way. [When he walked in it was as a giant pigeon and you may have seen him, so this is a deliberately obvious lie.]
The Psionic here with a very important announcement.
The sense of camaraderie in our department is at an all time low. So, to fix this, attendance at Rex the Rat's birthday party is now mandatory for all Labor Department members. Also I will be bringing twister and you absolutely will have to play.
Chiaki may have gotten out of planning, but Lars, don't think you won't have to make the food still. And I think we have someone new so if your name is Adrien and you're listening to this, please go ahead and publicly introduce yourself. Yes you will have to come to the party.
If anyone knows any party games that will force people to get up close and personal, I'm open to suggestions.
First, did anyone else plant the seeds the Ringmaster gave us after we got back from Hell? [ How many of the new people even know they've been to Hell??? Well whatever, it's not like it's a big secret or anything. ] They grow fast -- mine's already fruiting.
I want to try something, so let me know if you're up to donating some of yours for an experiment.
Second, engineering's working on getting a training yard set up in the forest. It's not all done yet, but there's space for sparring, exercise, and target practice if you need it. I expect to see all nightrunners out there, but anyone else can drop by if they're interested. Only rules are "don't kill your co-workers" and "you break it, you fix it."
I'll be there in the mornings if you need me. Strange, you can come by later, but don't think you get to slack off just because it's performance week.
[ When Strange starts talking, it's after a pause, like he's mulling over his words before he says them. ]
I think it's obvious that the realm the carnival resides in is exceedingly magical. People can learn spells even if they come from a world without magic and those with magic can find their talents pulled in ways they weren't expecting. [ exhibit A, Tamaki. exhibit B, Childermass. ] I think that it's also obvious that there's opportunity for a bit of chaos, especially from magic that someone from a non-magical world has just learned.
[ says the person who generally causes 75% of the magical chaos to begin with. Still, there's nothing condemning in Strange's tone as he talks about people messing things up...if anything, there's a hint of awe. Magic is awesome, after all, and he's so pumped that people in the carnival are picking up spells. ]
Most of you know me already but for those who don't, I am Jonathan Strange, magician and nightrunner. Obviously my duties to the carnival come first, but should anyone with magic, whether from their home or the carnival, want someone to practice, discuss, or explore magic with, I'll gladly offer my help! [ because he is a huge nerd and wants to see how everybody else's magic shakes out. ]
Of course, the offer of discussion extends to all the carnival. [ He can't help but laugh a little, tone obviously chipper. ] After all, you can still talk about magic even if you can't perform it!
Okay. I'm bored. So, all'a you pinheads:
What're your favorite foods?
[Lars isn't totally trying to get intel for Psi, deeefintely not...]
[Jeez, Ginko feels like he has been on the radio a lot lately. But he does sound considerably less distressed than the last time he made an announcement.]
Hey, so I know people might, uh… be getting tired of hearing from me, given recent circumstances. But it’s good news this time, I promise.
Our rat king, Rex, seems to be growing his seventh head, which makes him six years old now. If anyone wants to come by and see, he’s in the menagerie as usual; I’d recommend it, since this might be some of you guys’ only chance to see this. Uh… be careful, though, it can’t see yet, so it might be a little more prone to bite than the others. Just watch your hands.
- Tags:!ringmaster, allen walker, annabelle blishwick, ginko, jonathan strange, lambert, lars, snake, steven universe, tamaki yotsuba, tanyuu karibusa