[Sans is blue.]
[Lambert is dark red.]

( [ Supervisors’ Channel ] )

[ Public Channel ]

[ Lambert’s voice is terse, and irritable: ]

Our next stop’s called Heartstone Manor. We’re going to go over some ground rules to make everyone's life, especially mine, a lot easier.

[Sans is also here.]

The RM has already covered a lot of this in her announcement, but it is officially our jobs to make sure that it sinks in. Dealt with True Fae before? Then you know this isn’t a joke. Yes, your fashion sense and table etiquette are now a matter of life and death. This is me, Sans, telling you to take this seriously. Hopefully that means something to you.

To summarize the gist of what was said, here are some basic RULES. The Nightrider and I will be watching. So, even if the Prince doesn’t catch you, we will.

[Sans recites “The Rules” like he’s just whipped out a pair of reading glasses and is quoting them from an official document:]

DO:

• Follow the daily schedule
• Follow dress code
• Be polite to The Prince and his servants
• Keep your radio on you

DON’T:

• Whine about everything
• Seed rebellion or talk about rules breaking on the network
• Make any deals or promises to other fae servants
• Lay any hard disses on The Prince, ever, under any circumstances
• Don’t sweat the small stuff: this is gunna grate on a lot of us, so just focus on the end goal… which is not dying

Don’t mess it up.

That, too.

Nightrider Lambert here. In case you haven't heard by now: the things on Kerner Island eat settled daemons. So find somewhere else to take a daytrip. If you go anyway, do me a favor and keep your radio on you. That way we can all hear what it sounds like when a soul gets eaten.

[ He's about to leave it on that cheerfully sarcastic note, but then the faint sound of a female voice chimes in, scolding. For those who've met her, they'll recognize it as Lambert's daemon, the golden-eyed polecat that wears a hawk's shape outside the carnival. ]

Lambert! You didn't have to say it like that!

[ It doesn't seem to shame him one bit, though, since Lambert's going to keep right on talking: ]

For those of you whose daemon hasn't settled yet, that doesn't mean you get to be an idiot about going out there. Slipping and breaking your neck would be a stupid way to die. That said, if you're interested in doing some nightrunner work--

Come find us! [ The daemon interrupts again, louder this time, and there's a brief sound of a scuffle before her voice finally comes through loud and clear. Now it's Lambert who sounds more distant (and distinctly annoyed), though she talks right over him. ] We've got a map and other things you can use!

[ ooc: Lambert and his daemon will both be replying to his post (and probably fighting over the radio button, honestly). For ease of clarity, her responses will be in italics! ]

The Psionic here with a very important announcement.

The sense of camaraderie in our department is at an all time low. So, to fix this, attendance at Rex the Rat's birthday party is now mandatory for all Labor Department members. Also I will be bringing twister and you absolutely will have to play.

Chiaki may have gotten out of planning, but Lars, don't think you won't have to make the food still. And I think we have someone new so if your name is Adrien and you're listening to this, please go ahead and publicly introduce yourself. Yes you will have to come to the party.

If anyone knows any party games that will force people to get up close and personal, I'm open to suggestions.

Okay. I'm bored. So, all'a you pinheads:

What're your favorite foods?

[Lars isn't totally trying to get intel for Psi, deeefintely not...]

[Jeez, Ginko feels like he has been on the radio a lot lately. But he does sound considerably less distressed than the last time he made an announcement.]

Hey, so I know people might, uh… be getting tired of hearing from me, given recent circumstances. But it’s good news this time, I promise.

Our rat king, Rex, seems to be growing his seventh head, which makes him six years old now. If anyone wants to come by and see, he’s in the menagerie as usual; I’d recommend it, since this might be some of you guys’ only chance to see this. Uh… be careful, though, it can’t see yet, so it might be a little more prone to bite than the others. Just watch your hands.

[ Hey, guess who has his voice back? Turns out traveling to Mainframe gives you plenty of voices to hear. But is he actually going to report back with anything useful? ]

"All of Man’s works, all his cities, all his empires, all his monuments will one day crumble to dust. Even the houses of my own dear readers must – though it be for just one day, one hour be ruined and become houses where the stones are mortared with moonlight, windowed with starlight and furnished with the dusty wind. It is said that in that day, in that hour, our houses become the possessions of the Raven King."

[ For once, his voice isn't carrying that edge of mocking, actually managing to sound solemn and thoughtful -- not that it lasts. There's the sound of a book being snapped shut, and Lambert resumes the rest of the radio post speaking in his normal tone of voice: just a touch insufferably smug. ]

Maybe Master Strange should consider becoming a poet, if he ever gets bored of being a magician.

[ And then, as an off-handed follow-up to that: ]

All scouts and nightrunners, report in. Let 'em know what they're in for.